Sea Of Shards

Hello everybody!

I am for this time back with a new fanart~
Again Fairy Tail and Gruvion and genderbender...It didn't show the humorous way of this ship... a dramatic way...

I don't have a nice start in the beginning of the new year. It was a real shit. This fanart shows, how I felt and how I feel again after these month.
I feel that I am on a sea of shards... I had a love problem. I loved the best friend (boy) of my best friend (girl). I fell really hard in love...He was perfect for me. A guy that I could trust and be myself. I had the feeling that he probably felt the same way for me.
On the beginning of January I met her and some friends of mine. With the right questions she told me under alcohol that she loves him and she kissed him so many times and they do nearly some more...things. In the past I asked her many times if she loved him or if she saw him as a good friend. All the time she said to me, that she didn't love him and he was like a brother for her.
Under best friends you tell everything...every secret and so on, right? She denied all the time and lied to me...such a liar...And she knew very well about my feelings for him. It was like a hard slap in my face. It hurts so much...I can't describe my pain. I don't blame her, that she loved him or that she kissed him or whatever...I blame her that she didn't tell me anything and drop a bombshell with this news. If she had told me earlier, then it wouldn't be so bad. I just want honesty in a friendship, is it wrong?
She had so many chances to tell me everything. Everytime when I ask her if she loved him, to be sure, she lied to me, betrayed me. I don't understand why she didn't tell me the matter. I wouldn't be angry at her or something like that. You can talk to me in a very normally way...
I am sure she didn't felt really bad after this. She didn't see how much it hurts me and she knows me that I hide my pain, because of my pride. But she didn't care. My best friend is...too stupid (sorry for this word) to understand so many things...to read between the lines...or she didn't want to see it because of her ignorance.
On New Year's Eve she told me I am her only true friend and so on...but I can't believe in this words anymore...It sounds very wrong now...Written with remorse in a inebriation...I can shit on it...But now she had't any remorse anymore...pity! Very pity! Nice best friend...I knew her a very long time. 10 years...If you can't even trust your best friend, can you trust someone in a friendship? That I ask everytime myself.....

Why I chose Gruvion? Well I didn't wanna draw myself, him and her. I draw Gruvion in genderbender. I am Female Lyon, who spends so many times with Male Juvia (my crush) and had so much fun and showed me that I enjoyed the time with me too. But male Juvia had just eyes for female Gray (my best friend) and she betrayed me. I saw them kissing one day...and it hurt very much. I drew a sea of shards that shows that everything collapses in me. In the beginning when I drew it, I felt really good and I thought I could finish with this situation, but the longer the more it begun to hurt again. I cried to many times and couldn't finish my art earlier. I have mixed feelings. One way I like my art, but in another way I hate it so much...

Share with me your thoughts about my art, leave a comment. I would love it.

Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima

PS: I have Tumblr now! I will post the link on my profil. If you want to follow me on tumblr, go ahead. I would love it